Norway

There is a famous image here in Spain of former Spanish PM Jose Maria Aznar practicing esquí de fondo – cross country skiing. Not only does he look rather ridiculous it also makes me have to defend what we do during our winter holidays to those who are unfamiliar with the variety of cross country skiing. Langlaufing – cross country skiing following a pre-laid track – has a particularly bad image – that of boring, elite, and for the over aged – due to this type of images and the massive popularity of down hill alpine skiing. What we do is similar to this although there are no pre-laid tracks – and not many right wing politicians for that matter.

I have always felt that I have to explain myself – even excuse myself – to people asking about our skiing holidays. Why do we go all the way to Norway – to the middle of nowhere – only to sink ourselves in the deep snow, crawling up a mountain, just to crawl back down again? A valid question, very much related to the question why I play cricket instead of football or tennis. I blame it on the fact that my family never really was one of following the Alpine exodus towards the down hill slopes of Apre-Ski Europe. We tend not to follow crowds, they scare us. They would not approve of a nose dripping father, causing icicles to form on his snout or the wearing of unfashionable – huge – sunglasses. Something of which I am now – aged 26 – very grateful.
Esquí de travesia
Without comparing ourselves too much to Aznar – arguably the most distasteful politicians of Western Europe over the last 20 years – I would like to point out that what we do is, in fact, esquí de travesia – a form of cross country skiing of which I am not sure it actually has a name in English. I guess you could term it as mountaineering but then with skis. On the official Spanish website I found the following description:

La modalidad más libre del esquí. Mezcla de montañismo y esquí alpino, sirve para escapar de los tumultos de las estaciones. Similar al fondo, aunque va algo más allá, pues no necesita ningún tipo de huella. Utilizado para subir a cumbres nevadas y realizar travesías sobre nieve.

The most free way of skiing. It is a mix of mountaineering and Alpine skiing and it serves well to escape the tumultuous ski stations. It is similar to langlaufing although it goes a bit beyond it as it does not need any type of track. It can be used to climb snowy mountain tops and general cross country skiing. The Oxfam brigade
However, before I go any further let me say that although we have been doing this for over 15 years now, we are by no means professionals in this peculiar form of snow enjoyment. Compared to our Telemark (the southern region of Norway where we go every year) companians – the ‘Yatmans’ a Danish/British family from way back – we rather look like the Oxfam brigade, both in our clothing as in the poverty of our skiing abilities. Just one look at 11-year old Thomas Yatman and we are confronted with the sad state of our skiing skills. We continue to enjoy our holidays despite this obvious discrepancy. Over the years we have spent nights in huts with no electricity, no water, without a decent bathroom. I can tell from experience that hearing your parents pee in a pot – even though it being a beautiful Telemark Tin style pot – at four o’clock in the morning is a less than inspiring holiday experience. However, we keep returning as it is – funnily enough – really worth it.

Sauna and Vitro
This year, we upgraded. For the first time in my memory we went to a place in Telemark which not only had running water, but a sauna. Which not only had a kitchen, but vitro cooking facilities. Which not only provided various ready made tracks, but fully-functioning ski-lifts. Another first was actually meeting other skiers during our trips – complete with sweet dogs, pulling their owners across the ice. This all because we had returned to something which can even be called a skiing resort – Kvivtavatn – a place where my parents where first introduced to cross country skiing 24 years ago. In total we spent a week in the rented hut providing space for 23 of us. As mentioned above we are always accompanied by the Yatmans, although we are often joined by others making the stay that more enjoyable. It is difficult to describe the pleasure of passing holidays with this group of warm and socially capable people. Many interesting stories are told over a piece of deer meat, many tour plans are made eating a freshly baked bun and many, many jokes are made whilst drinking a third glass of fine Tesco boxed wine. I can’t imagine a nicer place on the planet than a Telemark hut after a days skiing. The Phallus of the North
Absolute highlight of this particular trip was for me climbing southern Norway’s highest mountain: Gausta. The mountain itself – visible from most part of the region at almost 2000 meters – stands like a pointy Vienetta cake high above the Rjukan valley. It was a hard, long trip, well lead by my father. On the way we had to negotiate a nasty, steep ridge before arriving at a high frozen lake providing a good opportunity to recharge the batteries before ascending to the top. There you will find a phallus type structure annoying observers as it spoils the natural awe of this snowy giant. However, as you can see from the photos the tower did serve as an excellent vantage point whilst ascending the peak. When we – a group of seven – finally got up there I kissed this yellow tower verifying that it actually made a very soft zooming sound. This confirmed that it was still working. Working? What was that thing doing up there in the first place? Well, it is actually a Cold War relic called ‘early detection system’ defending Europe against Russian missiles. To make things even more James Bond we discovered that there was an elevator inside the mountain providing an easy ascent for good old NATO technicians who did not share with us the same eccentric love for climbing mountains. As the Cold War finished some time ago this elevator has now opened for the public, making it possible to shoot to the top for about 50 Euros return in roughly 10 minutes. Instead, it took us nearly 5 hours to climb, but we did it for free. At the top the Martinis were exchanged for a hot cup of shaken but not stirred saft (lemonade based drink) as we took in the view encompassing almost all of Southern Norway – one sixth of the country’s size. Heavy water
Looking over Telemark next to a machine set up to protect Norway, Europe and the Free World against communist weapons, you realize what a special place it is. Not many people know that this vast region played a crucial part in the Second World War by sabotaging the Germans intent to harvest ‘heavy water’ from these mountains. This special type of water is used to construct Atomic bombs as the Germans were closing in on the Allies in the race to construct the decisive war-turning bomb. Things could have been different had a group of local saboteurs – known as the Heroes of Telemark – not been able to constantly make life difficult for the German technicians. After a series of successful small operations they finally sank the supply boat full of ‘heavy water’ heading for Berlin in a nearby lake.

As a kid my brother used to think that skiing in these mountains made him feel like one of these saboteurs, and I can’t blame him really. Despite his vivid imagination there is something in this wild nature that brings you back to the basics; far away from daily life, ski stations and Jose Maria Aznar.

Carmen did very well on only her second trip and as you can see from the photos she even managed to climb a mountain of herself. For me it is very special to show her this place which has been part of my life for over 15 years now. I hope I can convince you all to come with me next year. Go to my photo website to get an idea and we will see you in a hut somewhere in the Telemark mountains soon.